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They said what...?
The Best Bits of other stuff....as submitted
by NCBF authors
a selection of favourite
passages from books, epitaphs and song lyrics from our Festival
Authors...
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In Harrow churchyard, there's an 'anonymous'
epitaph to a young man who was the son of the lady who ran
a tuckshop when Byron was at school. Byron is supposed to
have composed it for her:
"Beneath these green trees, rising to the skies
The planter of them ISAAC GREENTREE lies.
There'll come a day when these green trees shall fall
And Isaac Greentree rise above them all"
submitted by Ian Whybrow |
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"When I was a student living in
King's Heath in Birmingham, there was a corner shop at the
top of the road. In front of the shop was a large grassed
over area on which cars kept parking - as a result of which,
the grass was always muddy and pitted with tyre marks. In
the end the Council sent workers to remove the grass and replace
it with a concrete surface, which they did. No-one told them
to remove the council sign which srood in the middle of the
area - so they left it there, concreted in place in what was
now a parking area for shoppers. The sign read: IT IS FORBIDDEN
TO PARK CARS ON THIS GRASS RESERVATION.
submitted by Nick Toczek |
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"Just sing the
song, baby!"
[Elvis Presley]
submitted by Shoo
Rayner
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"What is more enchanting
than the voices of young people when you can't hear what
they say?
[L.P. Smith]
submitted by Kevin
Crossley-Holland
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"If you want to
get out of the rat race, never lose sight of the fact that
there's b****r all stopping you"
[Derek Brimstone: folk singer]
submitted by Steve
Barlow
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"To a lowly illustrator
working freelance, the two most beautiful words in the English
language: 'Cheque Enclosed'. Who said it first I have no
idea...actually in any language it's beautiful."
submitted by Korky Paul
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"The unbearable
thing is that nothing is unbearable"
submitted by Nicky
Singer
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"A home without
books is like a house without windows"
[Eileen Colwell: Children's Librarian]
From a gravestone:
"Here lies Alison White
Who signalled left
and then turned right"
both submitted by Pippa
Goodhart
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"Rabbit's clever"
said Pooh thoughtfully.
"Yes", said Piglet, "Rabbit's clever".
"And he has brain".
"Yes", said Piglet, "Rabbit has brain".
There was a long silence.
"I suppose," said Pooh, "that that's
why he never understands anything."
[From 'The House at Pooh Corner']
submitted by Nick
Butterworth
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"There was a young
man of Devizes,
Whose ears were of different sizes;
One was quite small
And of no use at all,
But the other was huge and won prizes."
submitted by John
Foster (from Completely Crazy Poems)
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"A good book is
one that's not finished when you reach the end"
[Margaret Meek]
submitted by Gillian
Cross
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"Everything's got
a moral, if only you can find it."
[Lewis Carroll - Alice in Wonderland]
submiited by Paul
Stewart
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"O My Aged Uncle
Arly!
Sitting on a heap of Barley
Thro the silent hours of night, -
Close beside a leafy thicket:-
On his nose there was a cricket,
In his hat a railway ticket;-
But his shoes were far too tight
[Edward Lear: Incidents in the Life of My Uncle Arly]
submitted by Ian Beck
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"Don't let yesterday
take up too much of today"
[Will Rogers]
submitted by Pete
Johnson
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"Writing's the
way to make dosh
If you don't want to dress smart or wash
As long as your stuff
Sells more than enough
Everyone thinks you're dead posh."
submitted by Kjartan
Poskitt
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"They couldn't
hit an elephant at this dist....."
[Last words of General John Sedgwick killed in battle in
1864]
submitted by Nick
Arnold
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"Home is where
the fridge is - You'll know a man with a big circumference
when you meet me in the kitchen"
submitted by Paul
Geraghty
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"The face of a
child says it all. Especially the mouth part."
submitted by Steve
Weatherill
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"Television - The
Bland leading The Bland"
submitted by Livi
Michael
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"If you want to
see the girl next door, go next door!
[Joan Crawford]
submitted by J.J.Murhall
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"Go in the direction
of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined."
submitted by Catherine
MacPhail
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"The world was
so recent that many things lacked names, and in order to
indicate them it was neccessary to point"
[Gabriel Garcia Marquez]
submitted by Caroline
Pitcher
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"If at first you
don't succeed - then freefall parachuting is not for you..."
[overheard on a bus]
submitted by Jan Dean
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"We're allowed
to talk for ten minutes about what has happened during the
day then we have to go to sleep. It doesn't matter what
we dream about."
[Lights Out: Hugo Williams]
submitted by Roger
Stevens
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"The Worker and
the Thinker are Mankind's Only True Kings"
[James Connolly]
submitted by Alan
Gibbons
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"Life is what happens
to you while you're making other plans"
[John Lennon]
submitted by Francesca
Simon
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"Laughter is the
closest distance between two people"
[Victor Borge]
submitted byRob Lewis
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"There's a funeral
in the mirror and it's stopping at your face"
[Leonard Cohen]
submitted by Alan
Durant
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"Good, better,
best
Never let it rest
Till the good be better
And the better best"
submitted by Julia
Jarman
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"It is sometimes
better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak
and remove all doubt"
submitted by Gwyneth Rees
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"Donner und Blitzen!
Spitfire!"
This is what every German shouted in every WW2 magazine
that I read as a child!
submitted by Jamie Rix
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